Well . . . in some ways today went a lot better than I thought it would - and it other ways it was worse. It started with bloodwork - oh the dreaded bloodwork. Why do I freak out with needles? I mean I freeze when the talk of needles and taking blood begins. Like I was so stressed out by the upcoming bloodwork that I actually gave the lab tech the wrong birthday - what is up with that? And EVERY single time - after they stick the needle in and dig around a bit . . . I think - hmmm, that wasn't so bad - I shouldn't be as nervous next time. Yeah - right. So - I had to give 9 vials of blood - ugh - it makes me shiver just to think about it. Despite my intense praying for fast blood movement and my visions of healthy blood pumping through my body, my vein pooped out after 5 of them (one of the many reasons I HATE getting blood taken - my veins really struggle with it). So - a second one had to finish the job and through that whole second vein I was thinking - "And you think that you are getting a whole bag tomorrow - right:)
Then, I had to get chest x-rays done - which was not a problem at all. I have to say, I am very appreciative of the large lead blanket that they used to cover and protect my ovaries. Because frankly, my ovaries need all the help they can get since they struggle on a good day.
Next was the health history with a nurse and discussion of the actual bone marrow procedure which is pretty amazing and is definitely worth the time to explain . . .
1) I will be put asleep (thank you GOD) and the doctors will drill into my hip with a very large needle.
2) The doctors will suction out bone marrow from one hip. They get the most stem cells from the first pull and each pull after results in less stem cells and more red blood cells. Once they are only getting red blood cells, they will move to the other hip and do the same.
3) I will just chill (sound asleep) as my marrow is sent to the lap for the stem cells to be counted. My mom actually has a specific number of stem cells that she needs so the lab will count to make sure enough were captured (technology is truly AMAZING)
4) The lab will chat with my doctor and tell him either to sew me up or suck some more. This process will continue until they have enough. And then I will be done - easy as apple pie - right:)
Prior to sewing me up (I really don't think they are even sewing), they will replace my red blood cells using the unit that I donated if I lost too many during the procedure).
So - this process was explained, I was send to have an EKG, and my mom and I went home!
So - now to the not so good point of the day. We are headed home as I continue to drink water and dread the unit of blood they will attempt to take tomorrow (although I was pretty excited about the fact that the nurse told me to each whatever I wanted for breakfast!!!! - aka eat a lot!).
Then we get the phone call -- something is not good with my bloodwork. I am still confused by all of this and hope to have a much clearer explanation tomorrow - but basically, my unit donation had to be canceled tomorrow and replaced with further testing because the blood seems to be indicating a clotting problem. The numbers are showing that my blood is not going to clot fast enough. So what does this mean???? Well, it either means that I have a bigger problem underlying this clotting factor or that I just have weirdo blood. If I have a bigger problem - I am not even going to go into the suggestions that they had because it would be truly ridiculous - then transplant goes bye bye:( If it is just a weirdo blood thing - then I can get meds to fix it - i think - to make my blood a little "bolder" (like bold coffee versus weak coffee) as my aunt called it - and then I can give the unit of blood and go on with "the business" as usual.
So - as of right now - I am released from the dreaded massive "blood donation" to give a smaller sample for further testing. At the same time, my mom will be ingesting both radioactive materials for a heart scan and formaldehyde for another type of scan in the course of 4 hours in the hopes that we are going through with "the business" on the 29th.
Radioactive materials and formaldehyde in the same day . . . really? That seems like a GREAT way to get someone ready for a life-saving transplant:) Gotta love science.
I hear you on the needle thing! I have to take about 3 days prior to giving blood for my annual tests I must have each year for my annuerysms. I freak my self out, I know it - to the point where sometimes I leave the hospital before several times or even ride up & down the elevator till I get the courage to get off! And then for the MRI I have to have an IV hooked to my hand for the dye. I traumatize myself annually now for 7 years. This is all in addition to my annual blood work for my yearly physical.
ReplyDeleteMy best advice is to find that place in your mind and heart that you can go to where everything is safe and secure and serene. And be sure to practice taking yourself there when you need to. It's praying, it's concentrating, it's a personal ability to remove yourself from the reality of the moment. A prayer, a mantra, a verse that you repeat and it takes you away. And then, in a snap it is over. And I often wonder to myself, what is all the fuss & why do I get so freaked out about needles.
I so admire what you are doing for your mother. It is amazingly unselfish and giving, and speaks volumes about the person you are inside and out. Just remember to breathe. Be a part of your breath, the inhale and the exhale. Control it; own it; be it. Good luck.
Jesse
Hello Brandy from NC. You amaze me! I am in awe of what you are doing for your mom. My mom had to go into the hospital on Sat night/Sun morn due to an articular fibulation..her heart was short circuiting. There was nothing that I could do and that is such a "useless" feeling. But YOU, wow... God is certainly going to take care of both you and your mom. Keep Him in the center of all of this "business". :)
ReplyDeleteAs for the advice offered by Jesse.. that's the perfect solution to getting through it. Right on the money! I will keep you and your mom in my prayers and sure hope that the next blog is good news about your clotting. Keep your spirits up girl. You sound great! Love to read about what you are doing and how you feel about it. You are a true inspiration! Love you! Diane PS Miss you here!